SNAKES ON A PLANE

"I want these motherfucking snakes off this motherfucking plane!"

I don't think there is any way I can approach this review seriously. I just can't. There are so many factors I have to put into this review, such as how its called SNAKES ON A PLANE, since I would have never seen it had it not been called SNAKES ON A PLANE, and how saying SNAKES ON A PLANE doesn't get old.

I was unfortunate enough to have missed the opening weekend screening of SNAKES. I would have loved to have seen it opening night with all the other fanboys, but I couldn't. Even still, I had a great time at it. It was just a great mix of laughs, scary shit, stupidity, genius, and Samuel L. Jackson, I couldn't help but love it. SNAKES ON A PLANE is about just that. After witnessing a mob hit in Hawaii, a kid named Sean is flown from Maui to Los Angeles under the protection of an FBI agent named Nelville Flynn (they could have ditched that name, but Samuel L. Jackson plays him, so its still awesome). Instead of doing the clean/smart thing to do, such as driving by and shooting the kid then speeding away, what does the mob do to try and eliminate their problem?

They unleash SNAKES ON A PLANE!!!

Much ass-kicking and luaghter, mostly intentional, ensues. There's blood and guts, and a beagle gets squeezed to death by a boa constrictor (that's not too much of a spoiler). Basically, its awesomeness. There is no message in this movie, and the filmmakers don't make any statements. It's just campy fun, and its one of the best times I've had at the movies all year.

B+ (Which in other words is basically The Best Movie Ever)